At this special time of year ...

During this season of goodwill towards all men, spare a thought for the printing industry. This mournful little ode, which appeared on our doorstep this morning in a Christmas card from Social Housing magazine's printers Hastings Printing Co, explains why:

The Times the are a changing
Things digital abound
But all a poor print rep can do
Is to keep on doing his rounds

As sales are tight the publishers tell me
With paginations falling
I ask to quote their magazine
I get a buyer's mauling

You've been commoditised, they say
Service do not me sell
What we want is money off
Or don't bother ringing my bell

There's several print reps every day
Knocking at my door
All promising to print it
For less money than before

But we don't need more litho printing
We can publish on the net
We've just installed fast broadband
And it's the coolest yet

Day in day out, I stagger on
My samples quick to show
I'll find a buyer somewhere
With artwork ready to go

The weather's cold, the traffic hell
This rep is now in need
Cos back at base what's driving me
Four hungry presses to feed!

Christmas is a coming
The turkey's getting fat
So please put a print job
In this poor old print rep's hat

The moral of my ditty is
We won't throw in the can
Just because we've been surrounded
By networked, digital man

He's gone online. The World Wide Web!
It's really rather sad
Failed to tweak his SEO
The site stats show it's dead

His miracle technology
Often fails to fly
And it's all so complicated
He seldom knoweth why

The internet may be wonderous
Delivering messages in a flash
But when did your printer last tell you
That his Heidelberg had crashed?

Litho print quality can be stunning
With convenience unsurpassed
Its value has never been better
And delivery times are fast

So WOW them with your brochure
And with its look and feel
Page-by-page from cover-to-cover
They'll soon take in your spiel

There's no technology to grapple with
Just turn a simple page
The reader stays quite calm throughout
No storming off in rage

So when it really matters
Your products for to sell
Forget digital and the internet
And just give me a bell.

Don't worry, Hastings - Social Housing magazine has no intention of going digital-only anytime soon. So at least that's one contract you can continue to count on!